Thieves’ Guild Owner’s Manual: The Urchin

By October 23, 2014Uncategorized

Even the most Masterful of Master Thieves started from humble origins, much like you, dear reader, are starting out your career as a Thieves’ Guild administrator by skimming a blog post on a website. Of course, you’ll find reading doesn’t quite suit Master Thieves. Indeed, they only do it occasionally, and even then only to determine the blackmail value of a recently-pilfered pile of documents. No, Master Thieves became who they were by stealing and skulking, and they started young. Very young. Yes, you’ll find that every Thieves’ Guild worth mentioning has a cadre of Urchins patiently waiting to learn the trade from their betters.


Before you get too excited, keep in mind that Urchins are limited in usefulness when they first show up at your Guild’s door. A fresh-faced Urchin can’t do much more than sneak into local businesses and swipe anything that’s left out in full view, but given time and resources, your Thieves’ Guild’s gang of badly-socialized youth can wreak all kinds of havoc. Urchins can provide distractions. Urchins can be taught to scout targets, just like a Master Thief. Urchins can even be equipped with slingshots to really harass targets!

Best of all, keeping a Guild full of well-trained Urchins is exceedingly affordable: all they eat is gruel! No matter how many Master Thieves you eventually end up with under your control, you’ll always want a solid squad of Urchins supporting them from a darkened alleyway.


Join us next time when we’ll briefly discuss some of the more common tools of the Thieving trade. No, really, join us next time, or we’ll send a group of poorly-behaved kids to wreck up your place of business. It’s up to you. We trust that you’ll make the right choice.